DNN presents - The Real X Files, Episode One

Chandra: Ladies, we had a good show tonight, but I've gotta watch The Real X Files.
Britney: The Real X Files! I want to see that!
Ticcara: I didn't know there was a new X Files show.
Chandra: Oh yeah - it reboots the 9th season, when Mulder came back and starts from there.

Ticcara: I don't see a TV.

Britney: Girl, get in the 21st century! You can watch TV on the internet now!

Chandra: Let me set up the computer, and you ladies can go change out of those ugly outfits.

Britney and Ticcara: WHAT?!?

Chandra: Kidding! Just kidding!

In the FBI Building, Lower Level:

Director Malone: Special Agents Scully and Doggett, this will be your new office. Sorry, but this part of the building is still under construction. Hey, you're agents - you'll deal.

Scully: Thanks, Director Malone. We'll be fine.

Doggett: Yes, thanks sir.

Malone: Please; it's Jack. Unless you screw up, then it's Director Malone.

Malone: Before I go, Agent Scully, I just wanted to say that before Director Skinner left, he gave us the location of a possible witness to Agent Mulder's disappearance, and that I've got my best people working on it. I just wanted you to know that unlike my predecessors, I care what happens to my agents, and that I promise we will not rest until we find Agent Mulder.

Scully: Thank you, sir... I mean, Jack.

Malone: You're welcome.

Director Malone leaves, and Scully and Doggett have the office to themselves.

Doggett: You okay, Scully?
Scully: Just thinking that the scenery never changes around here.
Doggett: Heh. It's not that bad.

Scully: Not that bad? Doggett, look around! We're in the basement... again!

Doggett: It's not too bad - we need to get some chairs in here. We can move out some of these file cabinets, and then we'd have room for our desks...

Scully: DESKS?? You mean, desks in the plural???
Doggett: Sure. There's enough room in here... and if not, well, we'll move more file cabinets.
Scully: Doggett, I like you better and better everyday... Hey! Are those donuts?

Doggett: They sure smell like them. Wonder how they got there?
Scully: Well, then this can be our first case for the department. Solving the mystery of how these donuts got here.
Doggett: Nah, I'd rather eat them.

Scully: Me, too. We're gonna need more coffee. though.
Doggett: Now THAT I know where we can get... along with some chairs...
Scully: Let's go then!

An Hour Later...

Scully: Whoa, I'm stuffed! Those were some good donuts!

Doggett: Agent Scully, I'm impressed. I never knew you could pack away that many donuts.

Scully: Well, when you grow up in a house with four kids, you learn to pile drive the donuts.

Doggett: So what do you think? We requisition some desks, a couple of lamps, a coffee-maker, maybe a microwave?

Scully: Why not go whole hog and order a mini-fridge? I'd love a place to store my yogurt. And you can put in your big subs.

Doggett: You realy know how to tempt a man. Deal.

Doggett: And if you want, we can even get one of those "I Want to Believe" posters and throw it up on the wall...

Scully: Let's not get crazy, okay? I want Agent Mulder found, but I don't want this office junked up with all his stuff.

Doggett: I was just joking. I want to put up a Jets poster!

Scully: Ha! You joker! You're totally on a sugar high!

Doggett: Don't forget all the coffee I had! Hahaha!
Scully: Hee, hee! Stop jumping up and down, Doggett!
Doggett: You stop jumping up and down, Scully!

Mulder: Hey! Why are we all jumping up and down???

Scully: Mulder?!?

Mulder: Hey, Scully. Hey, Doggett.


SMACK!!!

THUD!!!


Scully: I think we should put the microwave over here, Doggett.


Mulder: Scully? Doggett? Someone gonna help me up? Bueller?

(to be continued in Episode Two)